Ordinary

I think I may finally be getting out of this New Year slump. I was set back financially by the holidays, and somewhere with the quarter being interrupted and moving and everything else, I started losing steam. I looked back at my files and realized I have only been shooting once or twice a week, if that. At least I've finally figured out that it was going on, but I'm still having difficulty feeling excited about work and coming up with new ideas. Everything feels old lately and I'm not curious or interested in anything. Part of it, I know, is due to this relatively new location, being up north with little sunlight, too cold to get exercise or just walk around for hours making photos. Forcing myself to work on anything seems to be helping a bit, but I've got to do some new things to start feeling productive again.

So, I'm going to tell you about my ordinary day yesterday.

The alarm clock rings at 5:20 AM. I snooze it for another 20 minutes. John finally nudges me out of bed, and I get dressed, shivering. We brush our teeth and get into his car with his roommates, Dylan and Autumn, and drive to campus for work. I punch in at 6:04. I made 14 pots of coffee while talking with another student worker, Liz, and eating a bagel. After 7:00 I went back into the kitchen and chopped some 40 pounds of vegetables. I saw one of my bosses start shouting at a new worker, got irritated at the man and kept chopping my bell peppers. I leave work around 10:50 to go to class and reserve a studio.

10:59 I get the studio, but Christian is running late, so I just go back to class and work on photos. My teacher brought a big bag of vintage fabrics for me to cut up and use in this family photo project we've been working on since Thanksgiving. I printed all my images on iron-on transfer paper, put it on pieces of canvas, which I'm stitching together with thread, twine, combining with other pieces of fabric and backing it to keep it all together nicely. Some of the other students made nice little books; pictures of their family with their favorite Hemingway quotes or Bible verses. I'm envious of their progress and wish I didn't feel so jaded.

I got out of class at 2 and got an enormous plate of pasta which I couldn't finish, then finally went to the library to really start working on my French paper on Sartre, which was due the next day. I didn't get very far, when at 3:45 I had to go to the Health Center for a doctor appointment. The doctor is a friendly woman. She checked my blood pressure and my heart and whether I had any lumps in my breasts. I gained weight; I'm now 106 lbs. I've never been over 100 in my life. She gave me a prescription, sees that I had a history of depression and goes to talk to the psychiatrist. Very unusually-- in a good way-- he came in to speak to me right away because my prescription had run out, and gave me samples to hold me over until the next appointment. Probably why I've been feeling so lousy.

I kept working on my French paper until 6:30, when I realized that I was late returning a lens to school. I ran over and returned it, 15 minutes late and I can't use any equipment for 2 days. I walked through the snow to get a taco and the girl wrote "see cashier Corey for a good time" on the wrapper. I snickered.

Later on I went back to John's apartment and kept working on the paper while he and Dylan went to "wing night" at a bar nearby. Took a shower and went to bed.

Woke up at 5:30 this morning to do it all again.